The Art of Hosting

From the email list February 2013...

Dear Global Community of Hosts,

I have recently taken up the ...adventure and challenge to navigate in the
waters of Mentoring in Schools and Hosting through a PhD research and
practice in collaboration with the University of the Aegean local Department
of Pedagogy.

My intention is to keep a flow-connecting dance going between the research
and the global pulse of this practice around the world and at the same time
focusing in the special essences of it in our little local and country-wide
reality in Rhodes and Greece.
I feel that the mutual gifts are immense...

After all, Mentor was Telemachus' ...mentor-coach-pedagogue while
Odysseus/Ulysses was on THE Universal journey: Odyssey.

So I want to place a request/question in the centre of our circle which is:
What are the core-readings-writings, research  literature and reflections
that you have come across on the theme: MENTORING & AoH (in any setting;
school and family being the extra super focal for me!).
Would I find treasures in the AoH Ning, perhaps?!...

With love and deep appreciation from Rhodes, Greece and the Aegean Sea,

Maria

----------------

Hi Maria,
I completed my Master's thesis in 2000 on 'Mentoring Mentors' and despite
the passage of time have found a couple of references / authors have
remained quite relevant for me.  They are:

Alred, G., Garvey, B., & Smith, R. (1998). "Pas de deux - learning in
conversation." Career Development International, Vol. 3, No. 7, 303-313
Argyris, C. (1991). "Teaching smart people how to learn." Harvard Business
Review(May - June)
Scandura, T. (1998). "Dysfunctional mentoring relationships and outcomes."
Journal of Management, 24(4), 449-468
Senge, P. (1992). The fifth discipline: the art and practice of the learning
organization. Sydney: Random House
Underwood, P. (1991). Who Speaks for Wolf: A Native American Learning Story:
A Tribe of Two Press, San Anselmo

And the work of Richard Hale.

Many of these authors remain active in the mentoring field and I am sure you
will find more current references if you wished to search. I found that by
identifying risks associated with dysfunctional mentoring relationships and
building in contingencies for these, the success of the learning space was
enhanced.

Enjoy the research, Sue

-----------------

Thank you, Rainer, Thank you, Diana, Thank you, Sue!

In return here's an interesting piece taking further the "Homeric
Mentor"....  ~ A little treat which, no matter where it goes, is derived and
inspires
from a GREAT SOURCE - Archetypical:
http://www.nickols.us/homers_mentor.pdf

And this is an extensive list of literature for your own explorations and
synthesis:
http://www.carlisle.army.mil/library/bibs/mentor06.pdf

Thanks to good- reliable Wikipedia for these gifts.

I am copying my PhD Mentor here,  Professor Sofos to share the wisdom and
joy. :)
Together we weave through systems and media across Europe (especially U.K.,
Greece and Germany...) and the World...

In weaving mode and with HUGE APPRECIATION,

Maria

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Dear Maria,

My children, 16 and 13 are involved in a unique school that integrates real world apprenticeships into its curriculum from an early age.  Every Wednesday afternoon, they are out of the class and can design their own "passages" to obtain experiences in the community, many of which are done via apprenticeships along the lines of their passions.
Having my kids involved in apprenticeships in fields they wish to explore has been a connecting and growing experience for my entire family.
Here is the school, which has no grades and a very different curriculum overall:  http://www.jeffcoopen.org/  If you go to "Documents", you'll see Self-Directed Learning Overview and Apprenticeship Description   This public school has been using their model since the 70s and is the only one of its kind in Colorado, with 96% of its kids going to college.
I hope I'm not too off topic.  I've raised my boy and girl, mostly as a single mother, and the apprenticeship programs have been invaluable for their growth and exposure.  
Best wishes!
Kira
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more on this conversation from the email list...

Dear Maria,
I like the journey you're taking here. 
I for myself Integrated more and more a developmental view into the art of hosting. The book on the art of coaching, mentoring, consulting ... I found most ground breaking was Otto Laske's "measuring hidden dimensions".
(The book has this obscure title as development is 'hidden' to most people including mentors and coaches.)
I myself adopted as my mentor-coach the Ancient Greek champion Socrates, so maybe it's all about 'know yourself' as a special take on 'host yourself'?
Hugs from Austria,

Rainer
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I’m very interested in this thread of discovery.  I’m engaged in a whole systems, integral approach to mentoring to develop leadership capacity.   I have appreciated David Clutterbuck’s work on mentoring, especially developmental mentoring. And the work in the arts community on ‘omnidirectional mentoring’ is attracting my attention. 

 

Lots to learn and investigate around this topic.

 

Diana M. Smith

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When I was working in Ontario on the YSI project, I was hosting a large youth gathering with an Ojibwe Elder called Gerrard. Some folks on the list know him. I asked him how you become an elder ... and he said "when the community starts treating you like one".

Loved that. I wonder how this consciousness could apply to mentorship ..?
Cheers
Tim
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Thank you for that wisdom Gerard and Tim. 
And it harmonized with what life, Marianne Knuth,  Pawa and Chris Corrigan have taught me over the years- the elder in us needs to called and invited by others - and I may resist it for a while ....
I / you do not become an elder because it is cool or because I desire it...
The eldership in us is a gift and a responsibility. 
What would happen that is kind and good if more eldership was invited and accepted as a practice of life?
A bow to my elders....

Toke
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I want to ad a very inspiring research recently publish  on the wisdon of aged people for the less olders

http://legacyproject.human.cornell.edu/
 
The Legacy Project has systematically collected practical advice from over 1500 older Americans who have lived through extraordinary experiences and historical events. They offer tips on surviving and thriving despite the challenges we all encounter.
 
Ernest
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Everything I have learned about mentoring has been in the context of traditional culture, whether with indigenous Elders from Canada or in the traditional Irish music community.  Traditional Irish music is played and kept alive in a structure called a "sessiun."  There is a repertoire of thousands of tunes, but most musicians who have played for a while will have a hundred or more in common, and that can easilymake for a long evening of playing together.  Sessiuns are hosted by the oct experienced musicians (traditionally a Fir a Ti, or Ban a Ti man or woman of the house).  These guys are responsible for inviting people in, inviting tunes, keeping a tempo that everyone can play with, resolving any conflicts…in short they are the hosts. 
But they are also the teachers and the mentors and they dispense wisdom, lessons, encouragement and direction during and between tune sets.  If you are smart and you are learning you try to sit near them in the circle to pick up teachings. 
With Irish music, the best mentors I ever had always did a few things well:
  • They were better musicians themselves than I could ever imagine myself to be
  • They created space for me to play with them.  But they didn't invite me to lead the session when I was just beginning.
  • When they knew I had a set of tunes down they invited me to lead that set
  • They pointed out things that I could DO, rather than things not to do, and if they played flute (my instrument) they showed me on their what they meant.  There was never any abstract conversations about the music or technique.
  • They protected me from "hot shots" who like to show off by playing tunes you have just learned too fast for you to play with them.
  • And when I was ready I got invited into more and more responsibility with the sessions and was eventually invited to perform with them.
What was beautiful about all that was that, even when i became colleagues with my mentors I never lost the sense of gratitude of being able to play with them.  Even today 20 years later, it is a treat for me to play with those who taught me.
My experience with hosting practice is exactly 100% the same.  
Chris
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Hello friends,

I'd also like to toss in the possibility that we imagine shifting our vision of mentoring and mentors in a way that is inspired by how Tuesday and others suggest we shift our notion of leadership. In this case, moving from 'hero to host' might look like moving from a model of mentoring that centers a heroic mentor and guru-like teacher who possesses the wisdom to distribute to the lucky folks identified as mentee material. What might a mentoring network look like when the person who is seeking is at the center, rather than the idealized mentor? 

Then, rather than cultivating one-on-one relationships of differential power (even when that's shifting as in co-mentoring relationships) we can imagine cultivating networks of support, where we are all giving a little and getting a little for all the other nodes in our network or knots in our net.  As we know for our participatory leadership experiences, the network is wiser than any of it's constituent nodes.

When folks come to me for mentoring and when I contemplate the need for mentoring, I'm trying to engage them (and myself) in questioning purpose and bringing that back into the contemplation of right form and action. 

Reflecting today, though, got me also considering what a non-heroic mentoring framework might also be and what it might also support. . . 

thoughts? experiences?

Maurice
--------------------
Hi Maria and Maurice,

You were asking about resources on Mentoring.  Here's a little article from Kosmos Journal we did a few years ago in relation to particularly intergenerational relationships of learning that might be useful in this conversation on mentoring.  We've been hosting intergenerational conversations for a decade or so and this material was part of our learning process.  I'd be happy to talk with others who have an interest in this arena.
Fond regards,
Juanita
-------------------

Dear Friends,

 

I am coming back to this weave to add a little bow, a “combaki” (a little knot) – just as I learn how to literally do that in a real Loom – the ancestral Artistry has called me back to her magnificent “ergastiri”, workshop…

 

So this little bright bow speaks the Buddha word: “The teacher shows up, when the student is ready.”

 

How are our communities, schools,  organisations respond to this question: Are they ready as students to welcome, embrace and be “disturbed” perhaps, too (and Socrates is smiling on this one! ;-) ) by the teachers, mentors, elders, in both their individual and collective form?...

 

With love and appreciation,

 

Maria

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Wonderful calling question Maria, and great responses. Mentorship and I think of Socrates as this...is very much about friendship and deepening joy and wonder, it is a master practice to hold a beginners mind, open heart and that it seems is the mentor/elders essence that I respond to personally. I have been talking this very same question through with a few of my staff so have been thinking of this. Right now I have the blessing to be stewarded by a circle of elders/mentors and it is clear to me that mentorship is about being situated.... One of my mentors is a guide and elder to the national reconciliation process here in Canada. He is situated to guide peace into dark spaces.  Another is leading work at the international level for environmental indigenous rights, his feet are to the fire of some major environmental challenges here in Canada and in South America... Our Indigenous elders are born out of the process of spirit and nature...meaning...their wisdom is evolved and evoked in service for the survival and evolution of the people and the community,... however defined, and it is nature and spirit who names those elders forward, It is understood that we recognize them from our spirits and from those places and times when we are graced to be in atunement with what is natural....All that to say something simple...mentors...elders seem to be those who by their spirit and nature are our guides to what is great within us.....are situated in the conversations/places that matter most....to do the work that matters.....bring peace where there is conflict (Nelson Mandela) and atunement to our true nature and spirit. whether in family as you have asked...friendship, within our communities or Nations as is the work of a personal elder I mentioned. Digging one step closer to your inquiry....the AoH commuity....a prayer blessing to what your work may illuminate......that we grow to be blessed with those friendships of deepening joy and wonder, and to notice those who for us who bring about what is great within us.....bring peace where this is conflict...and awaken us and guide us to our true nature and spirits in the work of convening around conversations that matter the most...

David 

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